Santa Barbara, California
To: Procurement Dept.
You idiots! I told you once if I told you at all, I don't care if we get a discount, NO MORE BANANA YELLOW WETSUITS!
I REALIZE that it is a highly visible color and is recommended by the Scuba Safety Leauge, but I'd rather have the standard fire engine red, black, navy blue, and silver on the books for Seaview's stock of diving gear.
The dive leader can wear the yellow or orange neon wieght belt. At least he won't be mercilessly teased about looking like a piece of fruit!
We will use the ones we have in stock, but NO MORE on order! It's hard enough to keep my crew from sniggering whenever Crane exits the hatch on a dive. He hasn't complained, but I can tell he doesn't like being so visible, especially to giant squids, whales, jellyfish, seaweed-monsters,sharks, and other plaugues of the deep, as he calls them. While I think he's being a bit sarcastic, and he does respect most sea life, he's had a few to many close encounters with sea creatures eyeing him as an easy lunch!
Aka 'the BOSS'