By Sharon Dunn
With Beta
suggestions by Carol F.
Commander Lee Crane, captain of the Seaview, changed from his suit into a
comfortable, warm sweater and blue jeans, intending to go for a walk. The air
was chilly, and a drizzle had started to fall, so he instead visited the
Cetacean Research building... a refuge from the last few hours of craziness. He
sometimes retreated there when he wanted to be alone, ponder, brood, and spend
time with other beings who were at home in the sea. There were only a few security
personnel around, being so late, and where there was staff working in a NIMR
facility, coffee was always brewing. Crane poured himself a cup and settled
into a wide window ledge on the tank.
One dolphin had developed an interest
in him, and she excitedly acknowledged the young officer whenever he came in.
Lee spoke softly to her through the impenetrable Nelson invention of
translucent Herculite. He doubted she could hear but
seemed to appreciate Crane’s company and his attempts at communication. There
were times, the captain was sure, she could almost read his mind and knew his
moods. Lee leaned his head against the glass for a moment, and 'his' dolphin
put her head against the same spot as if trying to comfort him.
It had been a long night that he was
relieved had ended. Crane made it clear to Nelson that he would never be ‘persuaded’ into an assignment like that again...
not for anything. Not for the good of the Nelson Institute of Marine Research
(NIMR), Seaview, the Navy, the
country, or Mom and apple pie. The captain took a satisfying, slow drink of the
hot, rich liquid, inhaled a
deep breath, exhaled it in a sigh of relief, put the cup down, and leaned back
against the cool stone wall. The dolphin stopped by to grin at him, then went off
to join her friends.
Three months ago, the admiral's younger
sister, Edith, had proposed a summer charity benefit to raise funds for local
animal shelters. Animal rescue was a favorite cause of her and her brother
Admiral Harriman Nelson. Lee tried talking her out of it; he loved animals too,
but this event was undignified and inappropriate. He stressed that the annual
Christmas Gala demonstrated to anyone who mattered that NIMR and its staff
supported diverse philanthropic causes. However, on this matter, Edith Nelson
was not to be deterred, and Harry defended her.
Chip Morton, Executive Officer of Seaview, and Dr. Will "Jamie"
Jamieson, the Chief Medical Officer for the boat and Med Bay, were in Admiral
Harriman Nelson's office for Edith's announcement.
"Chip," Crane implored,
"you can’t be in favor of this?"
"Who knows, Lee, it might be
fun!"
Crane shot him an icy glare, and his usually
bright amber eyes darkened like clouds rolling in ahead of a storm.
"Jamie, what about you?"
"I agree with Mr. Morton, Captain.
It's one evening; how bad can it be? I'm sure it won't be as rough as some
experiences I've had dealing with you!"
"Oh, Lee!" Edith broke in.
"Don't disappoint me!" She gave him a hug, which he only barely
reciprocated. "Please?" She released him and moved to stand beside
her brother.
“But Admiral, there has to be a better
way to raise funds than this!”
"No, I'm in this too. It's tough
to refuse my little sister."
"You've all lost your minds! Have
you all been brainwashed, or are you under the control of aliens or some
foreign state?" The skipper jumped from his chair and paced furiously
around the room.
Nelson leaned forward in his chair and
linked his hands on the desk. “It’s nowhere near as dangerous as most of the
ONI missions you’ve willingly undertaken. I can’t order you or anyone to
participate, but without you, yes, you,
it just won’t be as successful.”
“Lee,”
Edith said, “do you want everyone to think that you don’t care about abandoned
or stray animals and....”
“Of course,
I want to help them, even those that aren’t cute and cuddly,” Lee interrupted,
“but this is one of the stupidest ideas I’ve ever heard of! It’s... it’s a
freak show!”
“I
admit it’s an unusual fundraiser,” Nelson said, “but with your popularity
and...
“And
your looks..” Edith interjected, “it will raise more money than by begging for it.
Now, will you do it? Not for me, not for Harry, but those poor helpless,
downtrodden, sick, hungry and defenseless animals?”
“You
ever sell used cars?” Lee chided.
“C’mon,
Lee,” Chip said, “you’ve complained about the state of the shelters yourself.
Overcrowded, short on food, medicines and staff....”
“Lee,”
Nelson implored, “please.”
Lee
bit his lip, contemplating what he would have to do if he agreed to the
proposal.
“Oh,
very well, but only this once, never again. Understood?”
“Understood,
captain,” Nelson agreed.
“By
your leave, sir,” Lee requested curtly.
“Yes,
yes, you can go, but one more thing. Don’t you dare call Admiral Johnson at ONI
to volunteer for any assignments that may come up that day.”
“I wouldn’t
do that, and you know it, sir, ” Crane sighed, his displeasure still palpable
as he departed the office.
Jamieson and Morton looked at Nelson.
"He'll be alright once he cools
down,” Nelson said. “I'd
avoid him for the next few hours, gentlemen. Well, that’s all for now. Dismissed."
************************************
A day later, the senior command staff of
Seaview, its crew and male employees of
NIMR were summoned to a meeting in the main auditorium. Crane, Morton, and
Jamieson seated themselves in the front row. Nelson stood at a podium in front,
where he called the session to order.
"Good morning, everyone. Edith
Nelson, whom you all know, has planned a charity benefit for animal rescue and
adoption shelters. We're asking for your help to make this a tremendous
success. Now, I’ll turn the proceedings over to Edith."
"Hello to all, especially those of
you who are single; yes, that’s what I meant.” Edith looked professional in a
blue business suit, effervescently happy and excited. “Animal shelters that
care for injured and abandoned animals and arrange subsequent adoptions need
funds for their services. The Animal Charitable Foundation is a worthy cause,
and very grateful for your participation. No doubt some of you have pets and
will want to help."
(Polite
applause.)
"We seek to stage a benefit this
spring in addition to our usual Christmas party, so we devised the idea of a Ladies
Night Bachelor Auction!"
(Big
smile from Edith. Reserved snicker from Morton, waiting for Lee to explode. Low
groans from the assembly).
"Bidders will be over eighteen, and I’m sure they will be more
than eager to pay for the privilege of an evening with you. Win, win for
everybody!! You’ll have a date with a lovely lady, and the animals will get
much-needed funding.
There was quiet conversation between
the audience members — the skipper sitting in his seat, arms and legs crossed
with a pronounced scowl. Morton was fighting to hold in a laugh while Jamieson
and Nelson were ignoring both.
"The auction is in two weeks on a
Saturday night. Next Saturday afternoon, there will be a rehearsal at 1:00,
correction, 1300 hours until 1700 hours. Tuxedos are mandatory, and the
Institute will cover the cost of rentals if you don't own one. While the Foundation
would prefer Command Officers to be in full dress whites, I’ve been informed
that may not be possible as this is a completely civilian affair, but NIMR is
still looking into it. The Foundation is paying the cost of transportation and dinner
for you and your dates from the proceeds we collect, so there is no expense to
you."
The XO could feel the anger pulsating
from Crane. Morton was sure he heard a stream of profanities from under the
captain's breath.
Edith spoke cheerfully. "The sign-up
sheet is at the back for those who want to participate. That's it! If you have
any questions, please feel free to ask me. Thank you for your time.”
The men began filing out, most stopping
to add their names to the list. The officers rose to leave, except for the
captain, who sat sullenly, then bolted to his feet.
"Admiral!" He demanded,
struggling to reign in his fury, "This is degrading and unbecoming of Naval
Reserve Officers. Are you honestly going to seek official permission for us to
wear dress whites for this travesty? I wonder what Admiral Starke would say? Or
the Secretary of the Navy? Or the president? Or....”
“Enough, Commander! I think dress
whites would give the event more flair; frankly, it’s not your decision.”
“Not attending is, though!”
“That’s true; I can’t force a purely
civilian event on you or anyone. But, at least consider it. Can you do that
much?”
Lee was silent for a moment, then
ducked his head down. “I’ll think about it,” before stalking out.
Nelson ran his hand through his hair,
massaged his neck, and addressed the CMO. "You might check on the
captain's blood pressure later, doctor, if you’re brave enough."
Jamieson stared at him in mock horror.
"I'm not going near him unless he's unconscious." Chip nodded in
agreement as he and the CMO went their separate ways.
************************************
Saturday afternoon came much too
quickly for the commander's liking. He appeared at the venue in blue jeans and
a NIMR golf shirt.
Chip, Will, and Harry followed, dressed in similar casual clothes. Most of the NIMR
men in attendance earlier in the week were now joined by a few new faces. Kowalski,
Riley, Sparks and a few junior ratings rounded out the Seaview crew.
The admiral announced that dress uniforms
would not be appropriate since they had no connection in any official capacity to
the Navy. Lee let out a long breath of relief.
A male model had been hired to instruct
them on professionally walking a runway. As time passed, Crane became anxious,
knowing it wouldn't be long before he would be up there. The captain could not
help but be amused watching some of the staff with whom he was familiar or had
worked struggling with concentrating on holding their heads up while trying to
appear attractive and happy simultaneously.
Chip comported himself well and
appeared to be enjoying the adventure. Ski and Riley considered themselves
prize catches and put their entire effort into the part. Sparks was shy but
eventually overcame that after a few tries, finally showing some confidence.
Nelson did little more than smile charmingly, slide his hand into one pocket
and walk authoritatively down the runway; he always had a way of appearing in
charge and in control no matter what he was doing. Jamie exuded elegance,
dignity and a little vulnerability.
Finally, it was time for the captain. Every
man who preceded him was seated and observing with great interest as Lee’s
cheeks burned hot with embarrassment. Thankful for his Mediterranean coloring,
it was not too conspicuous. Lee slumped as he walked on the raised platform,
which in his mind was 100 yards long, trying to make himself small and
insignificant.
The doors to the auditorium opened, and
Edith swept in. "There he is!” She squealed. “I came just in time! Oh,
Lee, I know you're going to be the star of the show," then, turning to her
brother, Edith Nelson ran over and hugged him. "Sorry, Harry, no offence
to you or the rest of our handsome men, but Lee is gorgeous!" Crane winced
at her description. 'Gorgeous!' He hated
that!
"No offence taken, Edie. Have a
seat; we were about to watch the skipper go through his paces," her
brother said, pulling out a chair for her.
‘Go through his paces!’ I'm not a damn show
horse!
The tall brunette felt all eyes in the
room staring... scrutinizing him and his every move. It was unnerving and worse
now that Edith was there.
"Captain, please! You do know how to pull your shoulders back
and walk with your head up, don't you? You've probably done it your whole
military career!" the instructor implored him impatiently. "Alright,
let's try this again, from the start and for heaven's sake, pay
attention!"
If anyone in the military intelligence
community gets wind of this, I'll never hear the end of it, and I'll never live
it down. If I can survive this, I can survive anything.
Lee was aroused from his deep thoughts
by the sound of catcalls and whistles. He looked down to see his best friend
and brother of the heart, Chip Morton, as the instigator. Smartass! I'll see if he's still laughing while cleaning the heads with
a toothbrush on the next cruise.
Crane was exceptionally uncomfortable
and could not relax his body, so he appeared rigid and cold. The captain had
fixed his glare on the exec before starting down the aisle again, silently admonishing
him to keep his comments to himself. Morton slapped his hand over his mouth to stifle
the laughter about to erupt.
Edith sidled up beside Lee when the
rehearsals were over. "You were wonderful!! I wish the Navy would allow
the dress uniforms! That would entice the women to sign blank checks to spend
an evening with you, but they probably will anyway!"
He gave her a weak smile. "Thank
you, Edith."
**************************************
Despite his best efforts to try and
hold on to every second, to every minute during the ensuing week and wishing he
could stop time, the day of the event inevitably arrived. Lee donned his black
tuxedo with the black bow tie, white shirt and black buttons and drove the
short distance to the venue. After it was over, he planned on quickly getting
the hell out of there, then heading home to change to go somewhere and feel ‘normal’
again.
Programs were handed out to the ladies
as they entered, detailing each male
NIMR staff member and Seaview rating
with their names, duties and interests. A separate program section featured the
senior command staff with color photos, full names, ranks, and job
descriptions.
The men were assembled in a 'green
room' off stage with refreshments. A monitor was provided to view the proceedings
in the audience and the runway. The
order of the bachelors’ appearances was that junior employees of NIMR would go
first, followed by management, then department heads. The Seaview group would follow with junior ratings, Kowalski, Riley, junior
officer Sparks, then headliners, Jamieson, Morton, Crane and Nelson. Edith
walked through the room, expressing her thanks and offering encouragement to
each participant. Lee sat in a corner and sulked, nodding to her as she
approached and standing in her presence.
"Lee, please, try and enjoy this
or at least look like you're enjoying it. It's only one night!" she
entreated him.
"Sure, but then I have to go on a
'date’ with some woman who bought me! Bought
me, Edie!"
"Oh, for heaven’s sake, Lee! Have
fun with it!!"
"Hardly!" he responded sullenly.
"By the way, I talked with Harry,
and we decided that you will go out last since, as he said, you are the ‘star
attraction.' He's not expecting to draw
much attention, but I think my dear brother underestimates himself!"
"Edith..."
"Yes, Lee dear?"
He threw his arms up, then let them
drop to his side in defeat. "Never mind. It won't change anything."
"Good boy! Just go out there and
be your usual, charming self." She kissed him on the cheek before
departing. “You’ll undoubtedly bring in a hefty donation," Edith added exuberantly.
When the music started, Lee threw his
palm to his face when he heard ‘I'm Too Sexy For My Shirt’ by Right Said Fred. No! Not that!! Please let this just be the
opening and not a recurring anthem!! Maybe I could fake a sudden concussion
somehow, accidentally fall and hit my head on the corner of a table. No, I can't
do that to Edith.
Songs had been pre-selected for each
man by Nelson’s sister for their walk. Riley started the representation for Seaview while ‘Surfin'
USA’ played and came back telling Ski a ‘hot girl’ around his age paid $200 for
a date. Kowalski strutted out to ‘Stayin' Alive,’ sure
he’d fetch much more and hopefully land a lady who would be interested beyond
their official date. His winning bid was $300.
Lee listened to Edith’s introduction
with dread. "Alright, ladies. Here are the,” she said with a wink, using
her fingers for air quotes, ‘officers and gentlemen’ you've been waiting for!
Remember, opening bids for these fine, attractive men start at $2,000. Keep in
mind that this money will be going to animal shelters. It's for the puppies and
kitties, so open those pocketbooks wide!"
(Loud
applause, laughter, and whoops followed her comments).
The first of the officers was Sparks,
who gathered his courage and walked out to the song ‘Radio’ by Robbie
Williams. He returned, pleased to have secured a
date with an attractive young lady for $250. Now it was the big guns!
First, Doc Jamieson.
‘The Best Is Yet To Come,’ by Frank
Sinatra, sounded from the speakers. "Here is our first senior officer from
Seaview, Lt. Commander William
Jamieson. Doctor Jamieson served in the Navy and,upon
retiring, joined NIMR. He is Chief Medical Officer on the submarine and the
Institute's Hospital. Commander Jamieson is a trauma specialist/surgeon, respected
by the crew and officers, and we’re proud to say the California medical
community." Will casually walked down the runway smiling, trying to perform
as if he was a pro at modeling. He was shocked to see most of the women
behaving worse than the guys at his long-ago wild frat parties, with their
whistling and hooting.
"I hear $3,000. Let's get those
bids up!" Edith encouraged. “Ladies, Dr. Jamieson is a medical specialist.
With his intelligence, good humor, and skill, I'm sure he'll make your heart
race… safely, of course!
(Laughter
from the women).
Jamie rolled his eyes, wondering why he
didn't listen to Lee from the start. The agony of his ‘objectification’ finally
ended with a bid of $5,000. All things considered… not bad for an older guy! The
lady who chose him didn't seem too bad either. Maybe this wouldn't be the disaster he anticipated.
Morton was next. He fixed a stunning smile
on his handsome face and danced out to ‘Romeo’
by Dolly Parton. Crane could not believe his XO had thrown himself
wholeheartedly into the endeavor. Reaching the end of the runway, he executed a
perfect Naval salute with a smile and wink that sent the women into loud
cheering and whistles. Chip! Inscrutable,
serene Chip! Of all people! How could he?
"Ladies," Edith announced,
"Please welcome Lt. Commander Charles "Chip" Morton. Mr. Morton
is the Executive Officer of Seaview
and a computer and technology expert. He enjoys sailing his own boat, scuba diving,
reading, football, a variety of music, and long walks on the beach at sunset.
Try not to get lost in those heavenly blue eyes! Let's get the bidding started,
shall we?"
Chip walked happily back to the room,
and Lee was sure his smile was wider than before he left. "Guess what, Captain?
$8,000! Try and beat that!" Crane merely stared at him, completely
unimpressed. "She's gorgeous! About my age, I think, brunette, looks like
a model! Our date could turn out to be an exciting evening!"
"I don't remember asking you about
it, Mr. Morton," Crane said sharply.
"Just thought I'd keep you up to
speed, Lee," he laughed and joined the other bachelors discussing their
future dates on the other side of the room.
Harry made his way to the stage door. Lee
watched the monitor in disbelief. The
admiral!! The man was actually selling himself for a date!
A recording of ‘Sailing’ by
Christopher Cross preceded Nelson’s walk.
"Let's welcome retired four-star
Admiral Harriman Nelson, and yes, we are related. Admiral Nelson is a highly
respected, published author of many scientific articles, an esteemed marine
biologist, and a Nobel Prize winner who holds a portfolio of patents and
licenses for numerous inventions. Harry generously provided the venue for
tonight's event. From personal experience, I know Harry can converse on any
number of subjects not related to subs and fish (light laughter) and is very down to earth, aren't you, big
brother?"
Nelson smiled, nodded, and blushed
slightly. He hated being the center of attention. What was I thinking when Edith first proposed this? Why didn't I listen
to Lee? Yes, I love animals, but offering myself like this was not one of my
better ideas. He was taken aback when a beautiful woman, who had been
sitting quietly, observing, perhaps a couple of years younger than he, stood up
after the first bid of $2,000 and loudly proclaimed her bid of $10,000. No one
was willing to go above that, so she was the 'winner.' He was shocked when he returned to the room. $10,000? After spending that much money,
Harry could not imagine what she had in mind. Either she was crazy or very
wealthy… or both.
Finally, it was Lee's moment in the
spotlight. Before rising from his chair, he took a moment to close his eyes and
practice deep breathing, a technique he frequently used on his clandestine
espionage missions. Using his ONI training, he mentally disassociated himself
from the present as he had many times when his sanity was threatened.
The skipper stood, adjusted his bow
tie, and walked into the lioness's den with ease and purpose.
"Ladies, here is the star bachelor
of the evening, the pičce de résistance,
Commander Lee B. Crane, captain of the fabulous submarine Seaview." The chorus of ‘Simply The Best’ by Tina Turner
accompanied his walk on the runway.
Whistles, hoots, hollers and
foot-stomping resonated from the audience. Lee was present in body but not mind
or spirit. He was sailing into a spectacular sunrise on his boat, the spray
from the water dampening his face and hair as he turned the wheel at the helm,
dodging and weaving through the waves. He smiled at the scent of the familiar
salt air.
"Captain Crane is charming and
gracious, and who doesn't enjoy that? He has a lovely sense of humor; I know
because I have spent considerable time in his company... as a friend... nothing
more. (Giggle from Edith; laughter from
the audience). He is warm and kind with many interests, including sailing
his boat, hiking, mountain climbing, and other physical activities. No matter
how much you bid, it will be a bargain for such a quality man! Try to resist
running your fingers through that dark curly mane! Just one more sexy feature
of our extraordinarily handsome captain."
Harry could hear Edith's monologue and
felt terrible for his son of the heart. He knew too well how shy and private Lee
was and immediately regretted agreeing to the event.
Lee returned to the Green Room to find
all the men standing, staring at him in wide-eyed awe. Chip was the first to
approach with his hand outstretched to shake the captain’s hand. Crane had little
recollection of what happened.
"Geez, Lee!! You better take
security on your date. Some lady just paid $20,000 for you! Who knows what she
has planned for that kind of money! Congratulations, bro!!"
All the other bachelors shook his hand.
The captain smiled but was still on the high seas in his mind until he heard
the admiral's baritone voice pull him back to reality.
"Lee?" The admiral lowered
his voice. "Son? Are you alright?"
"Ah...yes, sir. Fine."
The senior officer squeezed his
captain's arm. "Lee, I’m very sorry about this. I should never have practically
forced you to do it. Are you sure you're okay?"
"Admiral. I’m fine. I'm glad it's
all over, except for the date, but that should be easier than this evening."
"Yes, hopefully. Keep in mind that
you did it for a good cause. You're a team player, and the crew will appreciate
you for it. If they get out of hand with silly comments, sic Mr. Morton on
them. That always works." Nelson chuckled to try and lighten the
mood.
"Yes, sir. If you don't mind, I'm
going home now. I suppose someone will provide all the details about the lady
who made the payment for me tonight."
"Edith or Angie will. Good night,
Lee."
"Good night, sir."
The skipper jumped in the Cobra to
drive home, changed into a hoodie and track pants, then jogged down the steps
to the beach, where he ran until he tired. Lee sat in the sand and stretched
out his long legs, resting his back against a solid boulder, lost in thought,
dozing on and off. After the last few raucous hours, he was relieved by the
solitude and quiet.
Sometime later (he had removed his
watch), he heard the familiar voice of his exec. "Lee, I know you're out there
somewhere! The car is in the driveway, and I checked the house."
"Over here, Chip... by the
rocks." Crane sighed. He was enjoying the peace.
Morton turned on a flashlight and aimed
it at the retaining wall, which also served as a security barrier. The XO
spotted him quickly and joined him on the sand.
"You okay, Lee?" Chip left
the LED light on.
"Yeah. I'm trying to put tonight
behind me. It was
humiliating! You, however, appeared to be enjoying
yourself, Mister Morton."
"I figured I might as well make
lemonade from lemons." They sat
quietly for a few minutes. "Those women! I've never seen anything like it!
They were out of control!" Morton let out a soft whistle.
"Yes, they were," Lee replied,
shaking his head. "Anyway, it's over now, except for the actual dates.
Maybe that will be an unexpected pleasure."
"You know, Lee, I was kind of
worried you called Johnson to arrange an ONI mission or something despite
Nelson’s warning. That's why I came over... to check on
you."
The captain stared into the darkness.
"It crossed my mind, but we have a lot to do before we sail in two weeks,
and to be honest, I didn't feel much like putting myself in harm's way right
now. I'm still trying to recover from the last incident." He turned and stared with laser focus at his
friend and brother with a warning: "Don't you dare tell Jamie I said
that."
"I won't! I promise!"
"I hope whoever won the bid on
Jamie is nice," Lee reflected quietly. "I'd hate to think his date
would be unpleasant."
"Jamie can take of himself, I'm
sure. This won't be his first rodeo since his wife passed." Chip enjoyed
the calm and darkness and the chance to talk with his friend without
interruptions.
"True. It would be great if Jamie’s
date is smart and sensitive like he is, and they hit it off. He deserves
someone special in his life."
"He does... someone he can go home
to and pour out his heart about the misery he suffers trying to care for his
captain. So, hotshot, some lady paid $20,000 for you!! I can't help but wonder
what she has in mind."
"I guess she has more money than
she knows what to do with. I'm a trained operative, remember? I can handle the unexpected."
Lee chuckled softly.
"I want you to call me with
details the minute the date is over!"
"Oh, sure I will!" Morton
recognized the sarcasm, meaning Lee had no intention of doing so. "It’ll be
fascinating to find out who paid $10,000 for the admiral and her motives for
dropping that kind of money! I have a feeling it isn't about having pets spayed
or neutered."
Morton laughed at the comment.
"Probably some fish nerd or Navy bunny turned on by an older man with
power and authority."
"And money," Lee added.
"That date is another story I will want to hear!"
Crane stood up and brushed the sand off
his slacks. "We'd better get back; it's probably quite late, and I don't
know about you, but I'm exhausted."
Chip checked his watch.
"Definitely way after oh dark hundred. At least we can sleep in tomorrow,
or most sane people would; I'm not sure about you."
"Don't quit your day job, Morton.
You'd never make it as a comedian." They trekked back to the captain's
home, listening to the waves roaring onto the shore. Crane headed up to bed;
Morton off to his home.
************************************
"Hello, Emily, "Chip greeted
the woman who smiled at him as she maneuvered her long legs from the just
arrived limo at the restaurant’s entrance. "I'm delighted to meet you."
She was every bit as beautiful as he
remembered. She wore a simple white linen blazer over a black dress that
tastefully skimmed her curves.
"Good evening, Mr. Morton. I’m
delighted to meet you, too!" She said as he escorted her inside.
The waiter led them to a quiet table. The
exec ordered a gin and Seven-Up for himself, neat, and Emily requested the same.
"I have to ask why you would ever
pay $8,000 for my company? I was very flattered! Such a lovely, attractive lady
as you should have no problem finding a date!"
Emily blushed, which the XO noted with
appreciation. "Two reasons. First, I thought you were very handsome, and
you're even more so up close! Second, I give generously to many charities, and
animals are one of my favourites."
"I'm glad you decided to choose
me. What do you do for a living, Emily?"
"I’m the CEO of my own Public
Relations firm in Santa Barbara. I have a branch in Los Angeles, but I didn't
want to live there. I should let you know I was also taking this opportunity to
do some business with the Institute."
"You didn't have to pay to meet me;
you could have called our Executive Office. Although, that type of business
might be more under the purview of Admiral Nelson. I'm not sure how much Public
Relations we do, but I think it’s an in-house department."
"If I had called the Institute for
an appointment, it would have been a business meeting. I wanted to combine
business... with pleasure," she smiled at him, and he suddenly felt warm.
They ordered dinner and another drink
each. "How did you find yourself on Seaview,
Mr. Morton? It sounds like fascinating work!"
"Chip, please. No formality
tonight!" he chuckled. "I always wanted to join the Navy, so I went
to Annapolis, graduated, went to Groton to study subs, was posted on different boats,
then Harry offered me the job. I enjoy being
the Executive Officer; it’s fascinating and challenging, and I love every minute
of it. There’s also the bonus of working
with my best friend, Captain Lee Crane."
Emily found herself lost in his blue
eyes. She noticed how his blonde hair
softened his strong facial features, and his voice exuded confidence yet was
gentle. Their food arrived, and they continued to talk through the meal.
"Tell me about life in public
relations. I'm sure you have to keep on your toes and deal with various
characters and personalities."
"It's interesting and fast-paced,
which I love! Sometimes, it's simultaneously managing multiple ‘fires,’
especially with celebrity clients. There are corporate problems too. We try to mitigate
negativity as soon as the client informs us, then issue a positive spin to the
press."
"We often have scientists on board
who can be difficult, moody, perfectionists, or just plain brats," he
laughed. “It calls for considerable tact. I imagine your job requires the same."
"Every day. There's the need to pivot
quickly from one crisis to another, a lot of hand-holding, and sometimes being
a mommy. It's not all like that, but it's not the usual 9-5, sitting at a desk
pushing paper. Diplomacy is often required with the press on behalf of the
client."
"It sounds like our jobs have some
similarities! Tell me about you, Emily. I like your name. Very old-fashioned
for a very modern woman!"
"It was my maternal grandmother's
name. She was strong and inspirational, convinced me that a woman can do
anything, and encouraged me to follow my passion."
Emily told him she was single, never
married, and had no dependents. She explained how she founded the company after
obtaining a Bachelor's in Accounting and Marketing and then a Master’s in
Communications and Media Studies from MIT. The
lady is well-educated, articulate and intelligent, he thought while gazing
at her, captured by her natural beauty.
She inquired about the exec and his
life when she had exhausted her story. Chip revealed he had never been married,
some of his life at Annapolis, his family, and what he could disclose about his
position on Seaview and NIMR. By the
way she looked at him intently and asked follow-up questions, he could tell that
she was genuinely interested and engaged in what he had to say.
Four hours after they sat down, the
waiter presented Morton with the check and advised him they would be closing
soon. Neither of them could believe they had been talking so long with no concept
of time. The conversation flowed effortlessly between them, and the exec wished
the evening would last longer. Chip called Greg to bring the car around, walked
Emily to the car door and opened it for her.
Morton gently reached for her hand,
lightly kissed its back, then helped her into the limousine. He wanted nothing
more than to kiss her full lips but restrained himself, of course! She reached
into her clutch purse, removed a business card, and wrote on it before handing
it to him. The blond turned the card over.
She looked up from the back seat and
smiled shyly at him. "It's my private number. Feel free to call anytime!"
Morton returned a smile that reflected
his genuine happiness. "I will, Emily. Thank you for a lovely night. I thoroughly
enjoyed myself, and I’ll definitely look forward to seeing you again."
"Thank you, Chip. The evening was
a perfect delight... and so were you."
As the vehicle pulled away, she rolled
the window down, put her hand out and waved at him. He reached for his cell
phone. The first officer ordered a dozen roses sent to her office the next day,
then placed the card in the inside pocket of his suit jacket for safe-keeping.
He would send Edith an email and flowers tomorrow as a thank-you for the
bachelor auction!
************************************
Nelson was the next officer up in the
batting order. Like Chip, he met his date when the limousine rolled to a stop
in front of his chosen restaurant.
She was as attractive as he remembered
and looked lovely in a red dress contrasting against her short chocolate brown
hair. Her makeup seemed minimal but complemented her brown eyes and high
cheekbones.
"Louise?" the woman nodded as
she stepped from the vehicle. “My friends call me Harry. It's a pleasure to
have your company for the evening."
Harry took her arm and placed it in
his, leading the way into a large room filled with enticing aromas and soft
lighting. The Maitre D' led them to a secluded table
in a corner. Harry ordered Glenlivet neat and offered
the lady whatever she preferred. Louise ordered a glass of a California Pinot Grigio. Although the charity had agreed to pay for the
dinners, the senior officers picked up the costs so the charity could keep the whole
donation.
The admiral noticed that she did not
appear happy when they took their seats. Perhaps she was just uncomfortable in
this environment or being with him.
Louise drank the glass of wine in a
couple of mouthfuls, then held it out silently, indicating he should request
another. A waiter appeared and took their food orders and her second wine order.
"Your dress is very flattering to
you, especially the color!" The admiral complimented her.
"Well, thank you, Harry. I call it
'Marxist Red.' It's one of my favorite pieces."
This will not be a good evening; I can
tell right now.
"So, what prompted you to pay
$10,000 for my company?" Harry smiled.
"Well," she said, carefully
scrutinizing him, almost with hostility in her eyes, "you weren't half-bad
to look at, and I love cats and dogs. The money was for a good cause. There are some issues I want to address with
you, and I would never have a chance to meet with you any other way."
“Are you sure about that? I’m certainly
willing to discuss most matters with anyone. What kind of work do you do,
Louise?"
"I'm the President of an anti-poverty,anti-military, anti-government, anti-police state
think tank. We believe most governments have excessive power over the people who
elect their officials. It's time for citizens to demand accountability from
politicians. One of our primary issues is the military war machine. In
particular, the bullshit about the Pentagon and the money they get for funding,
in the billions of dollars, and never have to account for it is disgusting,"
she said with vitriol.
He certainly wasn't expecting this!
"I can tell you..."
"What? You've got some
justification for subversively scouting the oceans for 'enemies?' You're all a
bunch of paranoid, silly tin soldiers, playing war games and potentially disrupting
the lives of innocent people."
"I can't get into the details with
you, but..."
"Of course, you can't! You could
better utilize all that money you waste on weapons, aircraft, and navy vessels
to help the poor and homeless in this country. You assholes create situations
that decimate the economy and stability of other countries, displacing their
citizens and forcing them to become refugees. Then people lose their shit when
they seek refuge here. Do you think those citizens want to leave their homes
and culture, their families split apart to come to a strange country where
they're not welcome? Hardly! My heart truly breaks for them. Meanwhile, you and
your kind go into a country and stick up a big old sign on an aircraft carrier
that says "Mission Accomplished" because you deposed the leader. Wow!
Just... wow!"
Harry decided it was easier to figure
out how to get Seaview off the bottom
of the ocean floor after losing all power than it was to reason with this woman.
Why? Why did I get the crazy one? He
was accustomed to calm, rational conversations to achieve a solution. That
would never happen with her.
"I suppose you and your organization
are very busy at times," he stated politely.
"Seriously? That's all you have to
say?"
"I'm sure what you do is very
important and worthwhile. Honestly, we, and by that I mean the Nelson Institute
of Marine Research, undertake many worthwhile projects to try and preserve
marine life and make the oceans cleaner for everyone."
"Our Intelligence sources have
informed us you also work for the government, especially in espionage."
"Some of our work is classi..."
"Some? Ha! More like most of your
work is classified. You carry missiles onboard, do you not?"
"Ah, you know the old joke... if I
told you, then I'd have to kill you."
"Yes, very funny, Harry. Risking
the world with the touch of a button. Hilarious." She had drank the second glass of wine and
requested a third.
Please... somebody... kill me now.
"You don't know the good work we
try to do and..."
"With a nuclear-powered submarine.
What happens if the sub goes down and you can't raise it? What happens to the
nuclear reactor as it disintegrates over time? What about the risk to sea life,
animals, and humans, contaminating water supplies?"
"We do have contingency plans and
are prepared..."
"Uh-huh. Isn't that what all the
nuclear-friendly nations say? What about Chornobyl, Three Mile Island,
Fukushima Daiichi? Nothing could happen there, they all said."
She spotted a waiter in the distance,
and she called him loudly. "Hey! You! How long does it take for food
around here?"
Harry's temper surfaced, but he managed
to hold it in check yet felt it necessary to speak up. "Madam, please,
could you kindly employ some manners and decorum? You are being rude and a
disturbance to the other diners. The serving staff deserve to be treated with
respect and dignity."
"My apologies," she couldn't
have sounded more sarcastic if she tried. "I didn't mean to upset the
bourgeoisie-class diners at this esteemed establishment."
Nelson shook his head and hoped time
would pass quickly. He ordered a second scotch, and Louise put her glass out
again, indicating that he should order another for her.
The food arrived, and Harry was not
very hungry. Nonetheless, he forced himself to try some of the Seafood Platter
while Louise had ordered Lemon Chicken Breast. They ate mostly in silence
except for a comment or two about the quality of the cuisine. To the admiral's surprise, his date enjoyed
the selection. He was amazed there were no comments or questions about the food's
sustainability and its suppliers' responsibility.
"Louise, if you are so against
everything the Institute and I do, why did you pay such a considerable amount
to spend the evening with me?"
"I don't have the opportunity to
sit down and tell someone like you how we feel and the danger you're doing and
could potentially do. Governments and politicians don't give a shit about the
ordinary person trying to make a living every day, having a decent, affordable
place to live, having enough food to eat, and simply taking care of their
family. We're dismissed as radicals."
"I do care, honestly, but..."
"But... of course! There's always
'but.' It's not your job…there are people above you. Navy and government people
you do work for on occasion. I get it."
Another waiter passed behind her. She
grabbed his sleeve before he could get away and held up the empty glass,
"What do I have to do to get another drink?"
"Would madam care for a glass of
the same wine?"
"What do you think? Yes, of
course, I want a glass of the same. A large glass. Full."
The waiter returned in minutes with the
requested drink. Louise took a large gulp.
When they finished dinner and were offered
a dessert menu, she declined and let the admiral know she had to leave. Harry
called for the limo, which arrived at the entrance as soon as they did, opened the
door for her, then ensured she was safely inside. Thank the gods that was over!
He returned to the table and ordered
another Glenlivet, sitting back, taking his time to
savor the taste and the peace. Realizing he shouldn’t drive, Harry called the
security officer and requested he stop by the restaurant again to give him a
ride home. The admiral left a very generous gratuity and offered his apologies
to the staff for his guest’s atrocious behavior.
He slipped into the back seat and
lowered the partition. "Thanks, Greg; I appreciate this."
"Glad to be of service, admiral.
How did it go, sir?"
"Greg, you don't want to know. All
I can say is that I would rather have spent the last few hours on a dangerous
mission on Seaview. It would have been
easier to handle than that woman!"
"Sorry to hear that, admiral. I'm
glad you called. Just relax, and I'll have you home safely in no time."
"Thank you." Harry leaned
heavily into the soft leather seat and stared at the transparent moon roof. It
would be interesting to see how his friends and fellow officers fared. He must
remember to send Edie an email in the morning; he would give her a piece of his
mind about the mortifying result of her bachelor auction.
************************************
Dr. Will Jamieson stood nervously
outside his chosen restaurant for his date to arrive. He arrived ten minutes
early to ensure she was not waiting for him. As the car pulled up, Will took
measured breaths to calm himself a few seconds. He opened the door to the
pretty blonde who had won her bid.
"Good evening, Christine. It’s
nice to meet you."
"Hello, Will. Nice to meet you,
too," she smiled and seemed pleasant but anxious. At least I'm not the only one, he thought.
They chose a seat outdoors on the patio
and decided on a glass of red wine. The night was warm; the stars and a full
moon added to the artificial illumination of twinkling white lights surrounding
the wooden walls and trees surrounding the outdoor area.
Christine started the conversation, thankfully, thought Will. "You're
the CMO of Seaview and Med Bay at the
Nelson Institute of Marine Research. How did that come about?"
He loved her soft voice, and her eyes
sparkled with warmth. "I was in the Navy, finally had enough of that and
switched to Reserve status. My friend, Admiral Nelson, had just commissioned Seaview and was searching for a
physician, so he tracked me down, called me, and asked me to join him. I agreed,
and it's been an adventure ever since."
"I'm sure it is!"
"There's always something going
on. When I'm not on the sub, I work at the Med Bay, and that is a little more
routine, but I enjoy both. What about you?"
"I have a Ph.D. in Nursing. I'm a
Professor and the head of the Faculty of Nursing at California State
University, Bakersfield. I also work at The Channel Islands satellite facility
in Goleta, usually in summer. Like you, I enjoy my profession. Some days it
tests my patience, no pun intended, but it's most gratifying. I like the name
William. It’s strong and noble!"
"Thank you. However, if you're
ever around the captain of our boat, you'll hear him call me Jamie. A nickname
he came up with," he chuckled.
"I've heard about the illustrious
Captain Crane. He has quite the medical record, doesn't he?"
"Yes! How did you know?" Will
was concerned about Crane’s medical history being made public and the subject
of gossip.
"Oh... word gets around the medical
community," she smiled conspiratorially. "I know some of the
specialists and physicians at NIMR. I absolutely assure you that they've never
broken doctor/patient confidentiality, so don't worry about that. It isn't that
difficult to figure out who they're talking about, especially so often. As you
know, your Med Bay isn’t the only place where Captain Crane has been a less
than cooperative patient.’”
“I understand,” he was relieved to know
Lee’s history was not the result of any personnel indiscretions.
“I don't know why we’ve never met
before. I would certainly have remembered you," she smiled at him.
Will tried to hide the creeping redness
by lowering his head, but she was a medical professional and wouldn't easily
miss it. "Thank you, Christine. I could say the same about you! I was very
flattered that you spent so much for this evening with me."
"I wouldn't normally do that sort
of thing, but a few of my friends thought it would be fun to go to the auction
and insisted I join them. They think I'm alone too much when I'm not working. I
liked what I saw when I read your biography and watched you on the runway. So I
spontaneously decided to take a chance and bid. So far, I am delighted that I
made the decision."
"My goodness! That's very kind of
you to say! I am pleased you did, too! You’re single... were you never
married?"
"Yes, I was for 15 years, but it
ended in divorce. I have a son who is, coincidentally, in the Navy. He's a
fighter pilot and currently stationed on an aircraft carrier somewhere; it's
classified even to Mom."
"That's not an easy program in
which to get accepted. He must be an outstanding young man!"
"He is. I’m so proud of him. What
about you, doctor? You're a bachelor... lifelong or recent?"
"My wife died a few years ago. I
have a daughter who lives in Massachusetts with her husband. She's a lawyer,
and he's a software programmer or something to do with computers. They have two
children, so I'm a grandpa!"
"You don't look old enough to be a
grandfather! Tell me about being a physician on a submarine, particularly about
being on Seaview… if that’s allowed.”
"Before joining NIMR, I worked as
a flight surgeon on aircraft carriers. I'm a trauma specialist, and as I said
earlier, things are different but interesting on the boat. There are routine
crew physicals and the usual cuts, bumps, and scrapes. However, there are also
issues with diving, hyperbaric medicine, and a certain captain, the world's
worst and most frequent patient, but the best friend anyone could ever
have." He did not make mention of werewolves, monsters lumbering down the
passageways, or plants coming to life.
"A colleague told me about an
unnamed patient’s intolerance for all things medical and your best efforts to
keep him in good health. I'm sure that can be frustrating at times."
"It is, but again, he's the type
of man who would sacrifice his own life to save his crew, and he has almost
come to that point more than once. I admire and respect him
tremendously."
As Will talked with her, he realized
the conversation was proceeding casually and naturally, and his worry had
disappeared, but he hadn't noticed when. He felt comfortable in Christine’s
company and wanted to learn more about her. The discussions continued through
dinner and dessert. Christine decided on a decadent chocolate cake and Irish
coffee. Will usually didn't have dessert but decided to happily indulge himself
with a slice of carrot cake primarily to extend the date and their conversation.
After two cups of coffee, Jamieson
called for the limousine and walked her to the steps outside, waiting for it to
appear. "Christine, may I call you again sometime?"
"I'll look forward to that,
William."
"I should tell you, Seaview sails on Wednesday. It might be
a week or two before I can contact you again. I didn't want you to think I was
leading you on..."
"It would never occur to me. I
think you are too much of an officer and a gentleman to do that. Call the
Bakersfield campus, Faculty of Nursing, and tell my admin assistant who you
are. I'll leave instructions to pass my phone numbers on to you."
The car pulled up, and Jamie opened the
door for her. Before stepping in, she leaned forward and gave him a quick kiss
on the cheek. He was pleasantly surprised and was glad she didn't see him
blushing again. Before closing the door, he wished her a good night and watched
the car whisk her away. His fingers instinctively reached up to where her lips
had touched him. Jamie chuckled with pleasure as he made a mental note to email
Edith Nelson and thank her for the bachelor auction.
************************************
Lee Crane heaved a sigh as the stretch
limousine came into view. Chip had told him that his date had gone well and
although he didn't know the details, Nelson's didn't, and Jamieson had hit a
home run. Hopefully, his would be successful.
The car stopped, and the captain opened
the door. Out stepped the young lady from the Auction night, wearing a black
leather bustier that barely concealed her breasts and a black leather skirt
that scarcely covered her six. Long black hair cascaded down her back and
framed her lovely face and eyes, colored with dark eye shadow. A thin black
leather collar surrounded her delicate, long neck; diamond earrings fell to her
shoulders. Opaque stockings and red, very high stilettos completed the look.
"Tiffany?" Crane asked, unsure if this was the same
woman he saw seven nights ago. She looked different. Very different. "It's
a pleasure to meet you."
"Yes, I’m Tiffani, with an i... at the end, Captain. Tiffani. With an "i" at the end. Of
course. Who cares?
"Lee, please," he smiled at
her, offering her his arm.
"I'm quite capable of walking on
my own," she said with attitude. The captain noted she paraded through the
restaurant as if she was modeling the little bit of clothing she had on,
assuming every diner would be grateful to gaze upon her. She stumbled slightly, and he took her arm,
unsure if it was the fault of the shoes or if she was already inebriated.
I have no doubt you want everyone here
to make sure they notice you. No one dresses like that unless they want
attention. Lee reached for her chair and pulled
it out for her.
"You look... lovely." He
wanted to say 'almost undressed' but decided against it.
"Thank you." Her phone rang,
and without an "excuse me," she read whatever was there and responded
by text.
He sat across from her. "I guess
my first question is why you wanted to spend $20,000 for an evening with
me?" he laughed softly. "That's a lot of money!"
"Because my daddy is rich and
wanted to get something for my birthday next week, and he likes to make me
happy," she smiled. "I thought you were way cute, and I told him you
were in the Marines or something, and I've never met a smoking hot soldier
before, and I wanted to go on a date with you. Plus, I like dogs and cats, and
the money goes to them. I have a little dog that usually sits in my purse but
decided not to bring her tonight." Small mercy, he thought.
"Hmm. So, I'm 'cute?'” Lee chuckled in amusement.
“To clarify, I'm in the Naval Reserve, and my rank is Commander. I'm not a Marine;
that's a different branch of the Navy."
"Oh! Oh well, same thing to me!
Guns... fighting... wars... all that stuff."
He decided to ignore the comment.
"You wanna
know how old I'm going to be on my birthday?"
"Well, a gentleman never asks, but
there's no harm in your sharing it with me!" He offered her his most
charming smile. From everything he had seen and heard, he would guess she was
in her early twenties.
"The big three-oh! I can hardly
believe it!"
Crane managed to maintain his
composure. 30!!? He could hardly
believe it either. She had to be the most immature 30-year-old he had ever met…
definitely a case of arrested development.
"You mentioned that the funds for this date were
a gift from your father. That was very
kind of him. What does your father do?"
"He works for a studio; I can't
remember which one. He's head of it or something. The movies are so lame, though. The one thing I’ve always
wanted to do is walk the red carpet with him, but I can’t because there’s
always some stupid bimbo to impress so he can bang her later." She smiled
brightly. "He promised, for sure, I could go with him the next time." Her phone rang; she checked it, then sent a
text.
Oh my god, this is worse than I could
ever have imagined.
"Do you work?" he asked,
attempting to show interest in her.
She looked at him like he suddenly had
two heads. "I'm a social media influencer. I have one million followers on
IG. I'm @TiffaniLove. I’m also on Facebook and
YouTube. You can like me and share with your friends." There had to be another meaning to THAT revelation.
"A social media influencer? I know
what social media is, but what is an influencer?"
Tiffani seemed surprised he didn’t know.
"I tell people who follow me what to buy, places to eat, shop.. that sort
of thing."
"Fascinating, but I doubt my
friends are on IG." SO not
fascinating!
Her phone
rang yet again; she checked it and sent another text.
"Your friends must be old!"
Tiffani looked at him appraisingly. "You don't look old, though."
"I don't feel old," he
laughed. At least, not
until now, he thought.
"Oh, I forgot to take a selfie
with you!" She got up and went to his side, cell phone in hand, crouching down
so their faces were in the frame. Lee plastered on his best smile. His face
hurt.
"So, Lee, what do you do in the
Marines?"
Edith Nelson, you're a dead woman.
"No, I'm not in the Marines,
remember? I'm in the… Navy… Reserves," slowly saying the last two words, hoping
it would sink in. "I'm captain of the submarine, Seaview," he answered pleasantly.
"A sub? Like... under the water?"Tiffani sounded very bored. Did she not hear Edith describing his job?
Did she read the program? Her self-absorption probably precluded any interest
in anyone but herself.
"Yes, that is what a submarine
does. It goes under the water."
"How do you drive it?" she
asked while scrolling through her phone.
The sommelier arrived and Crane ordered
wine.
"None for me," Tiffani chimed
in, "I'd prefer a Long Island Iced Tea." The phone rang, she checked
it and sent a message.
Lee looked up at the wine expert.
"I'll have a glass of '18 Chanin Chardonnay, and
the lady will have a Long Island Iced Tea, please." It was one of the most expensive glasses of
wine available, and he chose to indulge himself because the present company would
not be entertaining.
"About the sub, I don't 'drive' it
like a car. We have a lot of technological equipment for that, and our
Executive Officer, upon my orders, ensures everything goes according to plan.”
"Oh, yeah! That's... uh... what
his name? That Chip guy, right?" The phone interrupted again, and she
checked it once more and then sent a text. "I was so pissed! I wanted to bid on him, but I talked to a friend and
missed the bidding on him."
Thank you SO much for that compliment.
I’ll let ‘that Chip guy' know you wanted him instead.
Dinner arrived; Tiffani had Filet
Mignon while Lee had chosen the grilled Wagyu beef. "Gross! Why can't they
have normal food at these places? I hope it's good," She looked disgusted
while she poked at the steak.
The captain wanted to bang his head on
the table but resisted. "I'm sure it will be delicious, Tiffani. If I had
known you don’t like this type of cuisine, I would have taken you to a
fast-food restaurant," the comment was sarcastic, but it went completely
over her head.
"Yeah. That woulda
been cool! I am so low-key obsessed over fries and burgers! Not
healthy, I know, but YOLO," she
said distractedly. Tiffani took out her cell phone and started talking into it.
"Hi everybody! I'm here with Lee... what's your last name again?" She
almost pushed the phone in his face as he took a bite of the meat.
"Crane," he responded while
coughing.
"Yeah, Lee Crane. He runs a sub...
the underwater kind. I know... kind of boring, but who cares? Isn't he fabulous
to look at? Well worth the $20,000 I paid, am I right, ladies? Happy birthday
to me! I bet he’s great in bed, and I
can’t wait to do him for what he cost me! Anyway, I just got dinner." She
turned the face of the phone towards the plate. "Looks okay but it's that
fancy food. You'd think a restaurant like this would have something decent."
Tiffani took a bite of the steak. "Not bad!"
Damnit!! I hope to hell no one else
heard her say that I was worth the $20,000. What if they think I'm a gigolo?
There goes my reputation. Stupid job? Do him? Someone kill me now… where are my
enemies when I really need them?
"The Long Island Iced Tea is to die for! Oh Lee, could you order me
another one? Maybe it'll help wash this food down." She turned to her apparent
audience on the phone. "Okay, like, I'd recommend the restaurant, and the
steak is okay, but everything else on the menu looks disgusting. Does anybody
have any questions for Lee? Here's one... are you dating anyone seriously? @sailorsarehot wants to know."
Lee sighed audibly. "Tiffani, I don’t
appreciate this question and answer event, and
you’re not going to ‘do’ me. Would you kindly put the phone away, please?"
He spoke to her like a parent trying to reason with a toddler.
“Well, excuuuse
me!” Then, to her ‘friends’ on the phone," Sorry, all my amazing
followers! I’m signing off for now. Lee doesn't feel like talking or anything else, it appears. Too bad.
I really wanted to get him between the sheets and record us doing
it...”She blew a kiss at the phone but didn't
turn it off.
Crane thought if he had to bite the
inside of his cheek any harder, he would need to see Jamie tonight for some
heavy-duty pain relief. He looked around furtively and confirmed that people were staring at them both.
The waiter arrived with the second
cocktail for her, half of which she downed without a breath. Thank the gods I don't have to take her home
tonight.
"So, like I forgot," she
giggled drunkenly, “you're a colonel, right? What do you do for fun when you're
not doing…whatever underwater?" She picked at the food with her fork,
mostly moving it around like there was something dangerous lurking beneath the
perfectly prepared dish.
The skipper had been enjoying his steak
but stopped eating as he clenched his jaw and relaxed it before responding.
"The title is Commander or Captain, not
Colonel, that is Army. I go diving, hiking, sit on my deck and watch the
ocean.” He continued eating and didn’t look at her. “Other times, I hang out
with my friends from Seaview." Why am I wasting my breath telling her this?
It’s not like she cares.
"Your friends are that Chip guy
and the other guys at the auction, right?"
"Yes. My friends, Commander Morton,
Admiral Nelson, and Dr. Jamieson."
"So you go diving in the
ocean?" The phone went off again, and she sent another text. "Ewwww... too many weird things down there for me! We have a
big pool at home. I much prefer that!"
"Ahhh...
yes. Weird... things," he rolled his eyes… again
"You gotta’
have pretty big balls to deal with sharks and whales and all that other ocean crap!"
Tiffani leered at him provocatively. “I bet you’re big in a few other places, Lee!”
The captain was unnerved at that
comment. I'm not even going to dignify
that with a response. Who talks to a stranger like that? Who are this woman's
parents who raised her to behave like this?
"And hiking? That sounds boring.
Just walking around, doing nothing, and there are all kinds of snakes, bugs,
and shit out there. My followers wouldn't be interested in that."
"Yes. There are plenty of snakes,
and bugs and... other things."
The lady downed the rest of her Iced
Tea and requested a third. "Don't you think two is enough, Tiffani?
There's quite a bit of alcohol in them." He didn't want to drag her out
and pour her into the car.
"I had two before coming here, so
it’s been four!! Woo-hoo! I want another. They’re so
good! I can pay for it if you..."
He felt the eyes of other diners on
them both.
That explains the stumbling when she
came in. "No... no, the cost is not an
issue at all. I just don't want you to become intoxicated."More intoxicated than you already are.
"Don't be such a tight ass, Lee. Chill,
baby! Have some fun!" She laughed loudly and knocked her glass of water
over when she waved her hands in the air. "I get drunk all the time! My friends think
it’s hilarious when I post pictures of me with my head hanging in the toilet. Daddy won't let me drive, so he has a
car and driver for me whenever I go out - except tonight because you already did
that."
"I feel responsible for your
safety this evening, and I don't think you should have any more to drink. It
would be a good idea if you had some coffee. "
"Coffee? Who the hell needs coffee
unless it's got booze in it?" She laughed loudly again, attracting the
attention and annoyance of the other patrons.
"Tiffani, let's order
coffee."
"Nah, no coffee for me. I just
want another drink. Hey waiter," she called at the young man who walked
by. “Another Iced Tea!” Crane caught his
eye and shook his head, indicating no more alcohol for his date.
"Then I'll get the check, and we
can go."
"So soon?" She squinted at her designer watch.
"It's only 9:15!"
“It feels more like 0100."
“Huh?”
“One AM. Look, I’m pretty sure we’re
done here. You’re clearly unhappy and would rather enjoy an evening chatting on
the phone with your friends. You’re also drunk and don’t quite know half of
what you’ve been saying. Call me chauvinist, but it’s my responsibility to get
you home safely,” he said as he motioned the waiter over, asked for the check,
and called his date’s limo.
"Want to join me on the ride home?
The studio has a
room for guests at a five-star hotel, and no one is using it right now. We can
go there and bang our brains out,” she
said seductively. “Ever done it in a limo? I'm a lot of fun, you know!"
"I already said no to sex.” Oh, I bet you're a lot of fun, he ground out,
stemming his disgust with her outrageous behavior. "This
topic is highly inappropriate, and I don't think we should discuss it
further."
"But I bet you're really great in
bed! I love that curly hair of yours; I wanna run my
hands through it... and some other
places. I can be a real freak in the sack! I’ve got some coke that will rock
your world!" He suddenly felt her bare foot slide up his thigh, inching
higher.
The
captain rose, red-faced, grateful the waiter had returned quickly with the
bill. He handed over the cash plus a hefty tip and pulled Tiffani up. "Let me help you to the limo. It
should be here any minute.”
Tiffani was unsteady on her heels, so
Crane wrapped one arm tightly around her waist to keep her from falling on her
face. Outside, the young lady threw her arms around his neck and kissed him
hard, forcing him to carefully pull her off. He was relieved when the vehicle
arrived quickly, and he opened the door for her.
She leaned back suggestively on the car
before getting in. Crane diverted his gaze upward, wanting to avoid the spectacle
when her breasts inevitably fell out of the low-cut garment. "Take me! I
promise you a good time!”
“Sorry, no.”
“Daddy won’t be happy that I didn’t get
my money’s worth! Isn’t that right, girls?” she spoke into her still-on phone.
“Nothing good on the video except your good looks. Maybe Chip will be
interested...what’s his number?”
“Sorry. Unlisted,” Lee lied.
“Bet my daddy can get it. He gets
everything he wants... and you know what? I had a miserable time. I want my
money back!”
“Better make sure she makes it into her
house,” Lee told the security officer, who gave him a thumbs up and drove off
without strapping in his passenger.
Taking a relieved breath, Lee headed to
his Cobra and soon drove safely home as fast as possible.
Running into the house, he went straight
to the shower and spent a while letting the hot water and soap bubbles relax
him. If only the water could wipe away the memory of the last few hours! He
changed into a comfortable, warm sweater and blue jeans, intending to go for a
walk. It was chilly, and a drizzle had started to fall, so he made his way to
the Cetacean Research building... a refuge from the craziness. He would grab a
hot coffee, sit in the window and talk to the dolphins. He was sure they would
be far more intelligent to converse with than his date had been. He must
remember to send Edith an email in the morning... a very strongly worded email about the bachelor auction.
************************************
Lee’s office phone rang a few days later
at 1035.
“Lee? Nelson. Come to my office; we
have a little problem...”
“Little?” Edith’s voice shouted in the
background. “It’s enormous! And it’s all Lee’s fault!”
“Be right there,” Lee responded.
It was a short walk, and Angie cast a
sympathetic look from her desk in the outer office as he passed her.
Nelson was waiting at his inner
office’s open door.
“Apparently,” Nelson sighed, waving him
in, “your date’s suing the foundation for her money back.”
“What the hell did you do, Lee?” Edith
screamed.
“Me?” Lee replied, incredulous. “I was the
perfect gentleman!”
“Yes, yes, it’s all on social media,”
Edith said, “she posted her phone video… how noble you were. Her friends shared
those videos.”
“Oh, swell,” Lee said sarcastically,
then, “So what’s the problem?”
“You could have at least accommodated
her a little, couldn’t you?” Edith ranted. “Complimented her? Given her a kiss
or two?”
“Absolutely not! She wanted me under the sheets with her!”
“Excuse me, Admiral,” Angie said,
entering. “Lee’s date’s father is here and wants to talk to him.”
“Tell him Crane’s unavailable,” Nelson
said.
“No,” Lee said, “I’ll deal with ‘Daddy.’”
“Send him in, Angie,” Nelson added.
An immaculately groomed man decked out in
an Armani suit, Rolex watch, diamond tie tack, and a few elaborate rings
entered and zeroed in on Lee.
“You! Crane! I want to talk to you.”
Lee raised his hands defensively. “I didn’t do anything to your
daughter....”
“I know that. I just came to tell you
that I’ve halted the lawsuit to get back the auction money. And I’d like to
apologize for my daughter’s behavior
toward you and everyone last night. You handled a difficult situation rather
well, Captain.” Turning toward Edith and the admiral, he asked, “You must be Miss Nelson? Admiral Nelson? Again, my apologies to all of you. I
hope this incident did not reflect negatively on you or the Institute.
“To compensate for any embarrassment caused, you might like to know that I’m
authorizing an additional donation of $100,000 to the charitable foundation.”
“Not at all,” Lee said.
“Again, my apologies for everything. Well,
I must be on my way. Morning.”
“I’ll show you to your car,” Edith said
happily and escorted him out.
“Now,” Nelson said, closing the door, “Let
me tell you about MY date. By the way, even though some of the men reported in
with rave reviews, I think I can assure you there won’t be another bachelor
auction.”
“Glad to hear it. I really have more
paperwork to do than I need to volunteer for an ONI assignment.”
Angie was relieved to hear both men’s
laughter, as she’d been sure Lee would have given the boss an earful about the
‘damn auction’ as he’d referred to it before and even more so after.
Edith sauntered back an hour later, into
the outer office and handed Angie a form.
“You’ve got to be kidding!” Angie said
after reading the heading.
“It’s for a good cause....”
“He’ll never agree to another bachelor
auction!”
“It’s to help raise funds for the
children’s hospital. Surely Harry would be agreeable to that. Want to announce
me?”
“Your funeral,” Angie said, then
pressed the intercom. “Admiral? Sorry to interrupt, but Miss Nelson is here
about a new charity event she’d like NIMR to sponsor. The Grover Children’s
Hospital...”
“That’s right, Harry, dear,” Edith said
as she opened the door and strode in purposefully, Angie behind her. “The
auction was such a financial success, Edith said, “ think how much we could
raise by holding another one...”
“You’ll have to figure out another
fundraising scheme,” Harry countered.
“We’ll be sure to vet the bidders
properly.... I’m sure Lee won’t get a date like the one he had...”
“Sorry, I’m on-call with ONI for the
rest of the year,” Lee lied.
“But you’d be the star of the show
again! Harry, talk to him! Surely you can get him off of ONI’s on-call list...”
“I didn’t say I’d host another auction,”
her brother said with exasperation.
“For Pete’s Sake, one bad experience
with Lee, and you’re giving up!”
“His wasn’t the only unpleasant experience....”
“All right, all right, some of the
reports were less than glowing, but by and large, they were not that bad! At least look at these
files....” She handed them to the captain. “Can you honestly say no to helping
these poor kids whose families can’t afford specialized help? Well, go on, look
at them... Lee? You have a kind heart and wouldn’t mind taking a chance with
another auction....”
“Stop blackmailing him,” Nelson warned.
“These kids are in pretty bad shape,”
Lee said as he glanced through the files, then took a breath, “All right, if
the admiral agrees to another auction, so will I. But I’ll hold you to that new
vetting procedure.”
“Done! Harry?”
“There has to be a better way to raise
funds.”
“Not as profitable as a bachelor
auction.”
“I don’t like the idea either,” Lee
said, “but...it is for a good cause.
Those poor kids!”
“You can get out of being on call for
ONI without too much trouble, then?” Edith asked.
“He has his ways,” Nelson said. “Very
well, Edith. Set it up.” She kissed him
on the cheek, and Lee too, before skipping out of the office.
“I’d have thought nothing would get you
to agree to such a thing again,” Nelson said.
“Well, cats, dogs, and kids...no better
charities to help out are there?”
Nelson got up and pulled out a bottle
of Johnny Walker and two glasses, pouring out two fingers each.
“You realize I expect my sacrifice to
be etched on my tombstone,” Lee said.”
“What the hell’s going on?” Chip
exploded, barging into the office. “Edith says there’s going to be another
bachelor auction, and we’ll be wearing swimsuits this time! And you agreed to
it!” he glared at Lee.
“The auction, yes. Swim attire? First
I’ve heard of it...though, there is a
way around it...after all, wetsuits are
swim attire, aren’t they.”
“You sneaky dog, you.”
“Part of my job description,” Lee
smiled.
“Angie?” Nelson called out. “Better get
Edith back. Seems we need to scratch one of her ideas which we didn’t agree to.”
“You know,” Chip pursed his lips, “swim
attire might not be a bad idea after all...might bring in more money...I’d
better get everyone to put in some gym time. You too, Skipper, you’re getting a
bit flabby around the middle.”
“Well, if it’s swimwear Edith wants,
it’ll be swimwear she gets. I’m going to procurement to reserve one of those
new wetsuits,” the skipper resolved.
“That’s not what she meant!” Chip
explained.
“No, but that’s the only swimwear I’ll
be donning for the auction. I’m sure you can explain that’s the only way I’ll
attend, Chip.”
“Sorry to run, dear,” Nelson told
Edith, who raced in. “Lee and I have business at procurement. Chip will explain
things to you.”
Nelson and Lee departed, stopping by
Angie’s desk for earplugs just as Chip explained things.
“We need to order better earplugs,” Lee
said as he and Nelson found theirs didn’t work too well.
“You’re open to wearing a wetsuit?”
Nelson asked as they headed down the hall to the elevator. “If anything, I’ve
heard Angie say the new styles reveal much more than ordinary swim trunks.”
“Then let’s go raid Seaview’s old ones.”
“I get the blue one,” Nelson said.
“I’ll go with black. No way am I wearing
yellow!”
“We’ll keep them both in my bungalow.
If anyone asks, I’m conducting lab experiments on them at the university.”
“Harry! Harry!” Edith yelled as she ran
down the hallway. “You can’t do this to me!”
“You didn’t even mention swim trunks. Unless
you agree to some of us in Scuba gear, the deal's off.” Nelson narrowed his
eyes at her.
“Chip’s going to wear trunks. He’s gone
to the gym to work on his abs. There’s more than enough time for you to work on
your abs, Lee, if that’s what’s bothering you, but the sooner, the better.”
“There’s nothing wrong with my abs,
Edie!” Lee said indignantly.
“Not what I hear from Dr. Jamieson,”
Edith shot back. “Nobody will mind if Harry wears a wetsuit. You’re the bait,
Lee. Are you honestly going to let all those children down?”
“Apparently not,” Lee sighed. “Admiral,
I’m heading to the gym.”
“I’ll join you. Edith? The next time
you come up with another ridiculous scheme, leave me out of it.”
The elevator doors opened, and the men
were soon on their way downstairs.
Behind, in the hallway, instead of
having been duly chastened, Edith smirked and headed back to Nelson’s outer
office to tell Angie the ‘good news.’
Only two months to go...
*** The End? ***