SURPRISE!
By
Angela Field
Lt. Commander Chip
Morton of the SSRN Seaview surveyed the bar of the Sea Tiger with a distinctly
jaundiced air. Accompanying the Admiral
to the American Embassy in Hong Kong was hardly his idea of fun and he could
have killed Crane for dropping him in it.
I’m
sorry Admiral. You know what the Chinese
are like. I’ll have to be here to cut
through the bureaucratic red tape or we’ll never be ready to launch
tomorrow. I’m sure Chip would be
delighted to go with you. Every word
had been true and said in Lee’s most persuasive and polite tone and Nelson had
been perfectly happy to accept Morton’s assistance instead of Crane’s.
Didn’t
mention that I could have handled the red-tape every bit as easily as you
though, did you, Lee? Oh, no, forgot to
mention that, didn’t you? So much for my quiet day off for my birthday. Hah! You wait until I get back on board. You are going to be so miserable for
forgetting...
“Mr Morton?” Nelson
looked at the blond Executive Officer with a faint smile. “How do you fancy a
drink?”
“A drink, Sir?” Morton
was a little startled. Nelson had never
bought him a drink before.
“Yes, Chip. You know, one of those liquid things with
stiff alcohol content. After dealing
with those morons at the Embassy, I think we both need one. What would you like?”
“Uh,” Chip was never
at his best when startled. “Lemonade?”
“Lemonade?” Nelson
gave him a shocked look.
“Scotch,” Chip hastily
amended.
“Better,” Nelson
grinned amiably. “I wouldn’t have
thought you’d drink anything as innocuous as lemonade when you’re out with
Lee.”
“No, Sir.”
“Harry,” Nelson
corrected gently. “I think we’ve known each other long enough for first names,
don’t you?”
“Uh, yes s... Harry,”
Chip felt himself colour as long ingrained habits tripped him up.
“Oh and Happy Birthday
by the way.”
“You know-? Er, thank
you, S….I mean, Harry…” Chip gave him a startled look.
“Well, let’s say a
certain little bird dropped a none too subtle hint this morning...” Nelson
chuckled deeply, amused by Chip’s blank expression. “Relax Chip; you can take your time over your
drink. I have no intention of heading
back to Seaview for at least another hour.”
***
Half an hour later,
Chip was feeling pleasantly relaxed and comfortable and had decided he wasn’t
going to let Lee forgetting his birthday depress him anymore. Nelson had allowed him to switch from
straight Scotch to beer without complaint and proved to be a jovial and good
natured companion. Morton was a little
surprised to realise that the Admiral wasn’t entirely the staid unbending
senior officer he had expected. He was
even more astonished when Nelson told him a wickedly funny story from when he
had been an XO.
“Old MacGinnis was a
great Captain. But he did enjoy his
drink,” Nelson laughed as he finished the story. “But that was the only time I
ever had to get him out of the brig.”
“Not something that
happens on the Seaview,” Chip chuckled back. “Can you imagine Lee’s face if I
had to get him out of the brig?”
“He’d never live it
down,” Nelson rumbled in amusement. His
smile faded, however, as a large and meaty hand came down on the table between
him and the blond. The hand was attached
to an equally large and hairy forearm that led up to broad shoulders, a barrel
chest and the ugliest face either officer had ever seen.
“You’re at my table,”
The voice sounded so deep and gravelly it should have belonged to a troll.
“Well, I’m afraid you
are going to have to find another table this time,” Nelson replied pleasantly
but sternly. “Excuse me now, but you’re blocking the light.”
The troll like figure
blinked at the older man in disbelief and made a low grumbling sound deep in
his chest. He shifted his grip on
Nelson’s shoulder.
“Now hang on!” Chip
pounced quickly. “He outranks you, Popeye.”
“What did you call me
shrimp?” the huge man turned beer laden breath on Morton; his hand latching
onto the blonde’s shirt front and hauling him out of his seat.
Chip thought about it
for a second, then he hit him...
***
“Captain?”
Scowling in
irritation, Lee flung the towel around his neck and headed over to pick up the
intercom. Some days he couldn’t even
take a shower in peace. “Yes, Sparks,
what is it this time?” He knew there was
a reason he was normally quite happy to let Morton handle harbour details.
“Uh, I’m sorry to
disturb you, Sir. We’ve got a couple of
men in jail and we need an officer to get them out.”
“Oh, great,” Lee
closed his eyes and rested his forehead against the bulkhead for a moment. It felt wonderfully cool but only served to
remind him of the sweltering humidity lying in wait up on deck. He definitely did not want to ford his way
into Hong Kong and through the afternoon traffic to pick up a couple of errant
seaman. “Look, it can’t be that difficult to find Commander Morton. Tell him to go pick them up.”
“Um...”
“It’ll give me more
time...Um? Sparks, that is not a very
hopeful sound.”
“It er, it is
Commander Morton, sir.”
“It is?” For a moment
Lee went completely and utterly blank.
Chip was in jail. Chip I never get into trouble Morton was in
jail.
“Captain, Mr Beech is
on board, I haven’t told him yet. I thought I’d better come straight to
you. Should I...?!
“No, Sparks, no it’s
okay. Get me the details and I’ll go and
pick him up,” Crane paused, a horrible sneaking suspicion taking over him. “You
did say two men?”
“Yes, sir,” Sparks
sounded like he wanted to be in an entirely different ocean rather than
anywhere near giving his Captain bad news. “Mr Morton has the Admiral with
him.”
“The Adm...Sparks, if
you say a word of this to anyone I will personally have you keel hauled.
Understood?”
“Yes, sir, I wouldn’t
dare, sir. Will you be going alone?”
“Count on it.”
***
“Ashore, Captain? Now, sir?”
Chief Sharkey looked at his senior officer in astonishment. “Mr Morton could be back at any second.”
“I doubt it,
Chief. Somehow I really do doubt
it. It shouldn’t take long to er...sign
these...er...forms I’ve missed,” Lee adjusted his tie and reluctantly put his
hat on, bitterly aware that he was going to melt in the afternoon heat. “Can you handle things here?”
“Oh, sure, sir. No problem.
Kowalski and Patterson have the Ward Room well in hand. And Riley is ‘assisting’ in the galley.”
“Not that dreaded rum
punch of his?” Lee asked in alarm. Last
time Riley had put together his punch concoction, it had been strong enough to
melt holes in the deck plates. Lee had
had a hangover for two days, but it hadn’t even phased Chip’s cast iron stomach
and the blond had actually seemed to like it.
“I told Cookie to keep
an eye on him, sir,” Sharkey couldn’t quite hide his grin at Crane’s
expression. “Everything will be perfect. Trust me.”
Lee grinned back and
relaxed. “Naturally, Chief. Don’t worry, I’ll ...er...pick up Mr Morton
and the Admiral on my way back.”
***
“Are you okay,
Admiral?” Chip didn’t think that now was the time to be overly familiar with
his senior officer. Nelson was cradling
one hand over a potential black eye and looked as if he might be in a bad
mood. The older man had been napping
when Chip returned to the cell after making his one allowed phone call.
“I dare say I’ll
survive, Chip. Did you call the Seaview
and explain things to Beech?”
“Uh, yes and no, I
told Sparks to tell Sharkey, he’ll keep his mouth shut.” The man would kill
himself rather than embarrass Nelson. “I figured we don’t really want Beech
coming to get us. Sorry I got you into
this, Admiral. If I hadn’t swung at that
guy...”
“Nonsense, Chip. It was a marvellous fight. I haven’t had that much fun in ages,” Nelson
patted the Exec briskly on the shoulder.
“Where’s the harm in having a little old fashioned punch up on a man’s
birthday.”
Chip sighed in
relief. “This isn’t exactly...” He
started to explain when the door at the end of the corridor clanged open and a
familiar lean figure in uniform stalked in with the round MP who had hauled
Morton and Nelson down to the cell. Chip couldn’t help it, he groaned aloud.
“Oh, no...Sparks told Lee...”
“Correct,” Crane
glared at him through the bars. “Chip,
it takes an officer to get you guys out, and I can’t believe you did this.”
“Neither can I,” Chip
moaned. “Are you going to get us out?”
“I don’t have much
choice, do I?” Lee retorted. He glanced
at Nelson, looking slightly uncomfortable.
To his relief Nelson grinned at him.
“Makes a change, hmmm,
Lee?” he said cheerfully. He poked Chip
in the ribs. “Ole MacGinnis would have loved this.”
Chip smiled back
ruefully.
The MP touched Lee’s
arm, gently urging him aside so he could unlock the door and release the two
officers. “Bet you’re glad your Captain
doesn’t know about this,” the man chuckled to Crane as Chip emerged reluctantly. “Won’t be pleased at his XO having to fish
the officers out.”
“I am the Captain,” Lee rumbled darkly and
jabbed a long finger at Morton. “And he’s
my XO, supposedly the most sensible man on the boat.”
Chip gave him a
hostile glare, but didn’t dare say anything.
Not in front of Nelson. And certainly not with the kind of mood Lee was
in.
The MP looked at Crane
with shock. “Yeah? Then who...?”
“Don’t ask,” Lee said
shortly.
“Actually, I’m the
Admiral,” Nelson smiled wickedly. He was
having a wonderful time disconcerting his junior officer and his smile widened
into a grin at Lee choking in horror at his revelation.
“Wow...” the MP shook
his head, wishing that he had never asked. The Chinese man had never gotten
much good at reading US Naval insignia.
Watching Morton and Nelson move on ahead, he fell into step beside
Crane. “Uh, I wouldn’t want to be
Captain on your boat, sir,” he offered. The dark haired officer looked down at
him and for a second his scowl lifted to show a sparkle of mischief.
“Well, I can’t
complain about it being dull...”
***
“Lee?” Nelson stuck
his head around Crane’s cabin door as the young Captain answered his knock
cheerfully. Crane was seated at his
desk, wading through a heap of forms.
“It’s okay,
Admiral. Chip’s so embarrassed he headed
straight for his cabin and locked himself in.” Lee grinned broadly. “He won’t go near the ward room yet, and
Riley is on look out if he does.”
“I thought he was
making punch.” Closing the door, Nelson came all the way into Crane’s
quarters. He noted the neatly
gift-wrapped box sitting on the Captain’s bunk.
“He nearly set fire to
the galley and Cookie got a mite upset,” Lee settled back in his seat. “Admiral, when I asked you to keep Chip
occupied for the afternoon, a jail wasn’t quite what I had in mind. I never
expected...”
“You’re the last
person I expected to assume I’d get on my high horse about it, Lee. It’s not as if it’s the first time I’ve been
in the brig,” Nelson chuckled in genuine amusement. “Let’s face it, it’s not
every Captain who gets to fish his Admiral out of the brig.”
Lee stared at him
solemnly for a long moment, doing his best to look disapproving. Finally he could hold it any longer and burst
out laughing. “It was the look on Chip’s
face when he realised it was me!” he giggled.
“He looked so horrified!”
***
“Lee, I really don’t
feel like dinner,” Chip complained as he and Crane headed for the wardroom. Lee
had come to fetch him, finally bored of waiting for him.
“You can’t hide all
night. The Admiral doesn’t care, I don’t
care,” Lee grinned at his friend, his hazel green eyes sparkling with mischief.
“What’s the problem? It’s not as if it’s the first time. I keep telling you that you that you should
watch your temper when you drink scotch.”
“I only had one!”
“That’s all it takes,”
Lee pointed out.
“I wouldn’t have had
that if you hadn’t forgotten...” Chip stopped himself.
“Forgotten? Forgotten what?” Lee asked innocently.
For a long moment,
Chip simply stared at him and then he slumped. “Oh, nothing, it doesn’t
matter,” he turned away from Crane and pushed through into the darkened
Wardroom. For a second the gloom didn’t
register, then the lights came up with a blaze of colour and the crewmen packing
out the Wardroom let out a jubilant cry “SURPRISE! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MR MORTON!”
Chip blinked in shock
and looked over his shoulder at the Captain and saw the amused affection in
Lee’s eyes.
“You idiot, Chip. I’ve
never forgotten yet. Did you think I
really would this time?”
“You arranged all
this?”
“Sure, why do you
think I wanted you off the boat?
Besides, who do you think told the Admiral?”
A
certain little bird... for Chip the light suddenly dawned, but
before he could say a word, Kowalski had hold of his arm and was dragging him
forward into the depths of the party.
***
“I think I’m going to
have to pour you into your bunk,” Lee chuckled as he steered a somewhat
befuddled Morton through the door to his cabin.
“Nah...” Chip
tightened the arm he had around Lee’s neck into an awkward hug. “Thanks Lee, it
was a great party.”
“You’re drunk.” Giving
the blond a little push, Lee got him to sit down on the edge of the bunk. “You
should have stayed away from Riley’s punch.”
“You mean like you
did? Chicken...”
“Someone has to be
sober enough to take Seaview out tomorrow morning and it’s not likely to be
you,” Lee pointed out cheerfully. “Here, open this,” he fished Morton’s gift
wrapped present out of his pocket and thrust it into Chip’s hand.
“What is it?” Chip
asked, shaking the box curiously.
“Open it and find out,
dimwit,” Lee instructed as he set about removing Morton’s shoes for him. He didn’t think Chip was going to stay awake
long. “I hope you like it.”
Chip gave him a
befuddled grin. “I’m sure I will. Does
it go boom?”
“Not this time,” Lee
admitted with a grin. That had been the
box of explosive cigars Crane had brought the blond one time back at the
Academy. Of course, it had been
accompanied by a slap up meal at the most expensive restaurant in town too.
“I’ll never forget the
look on Griswald’s face when the darn thing blew up...” Chip giggled as he
struggled with the paper. “Why do you always wrap your presents up so well?”
“It’s half the fun of
getting them open.” Dropping Morton’s shoes to the floor, Lee perched on the
bunk beside his friend and watched impatiently as the XO tore the package open
and took the lid off. “You said it was
what you wanted. I had it engraved. I
figured the next time you get into trouble it might help...”
“Since when do I get
into trouble? It’s usually your fault,”
Chip found his voice, slowly extracting the heavy gold identity bracelet from
its nest of blue tissue.
“What do you call
today? You can’t blame me for that.”
“Oh yes, I can. It was your idea to send me ashore,” Chip
studied the inscription on the bracelet.
“To the thousandth man ...Lee...this
must cost you ...”
“It was worth it to
see the look on your face,” Lee grinned, delighted that his present was well
appreciated. He sobered. “Besides, I
mean every word. You’re always been
there when I needed you. I figure it was
time to show my appreciation. One of
these days you’re going to get your own boat, then where will I be?”
Chip chuckled, “The
scourge of the High Seas, that’s us.
Lee, thank you for this, I’ll treasure it. You wait until it’s your birthday, somehow
I’ll top this.”
“I’m sure you will,”
Lee slid to his feet and paced for the door. “That and the watch the Admiral
gave you should go well together.”
“I think he’s
embarrassed for not having realised before,” Morton murmured.
“Probably. Don’t
worry, I’ll remind him next time too,” Crane said brightly. “And the crew...”
Chip groaned. “Please,
don’t. I don’t think I could stand another inflatable doll...”
“That was a joke,” Lee
chuckled. “You liked the gold pen,
didn’t you?”
“Yes,” Chip touched
his pocket to make sure he still had the gold fountain pen Sharkey had
presented to him on behalf of the crew.
Their grins had made him feel warm inside.
“You’re a soft touch,
Mr Morton,” Lee teased. “And another year older.”
“That’s right, rub it
in. You’ll catch up.”
“Ah, now, that’s
something I always remember,” Lee mused.
“What is?” Chip asked
suspiciously.
“”That no matter how
old I get, you’re always going to be older than I am.”
“Get out of here!”
It was a good thing
Lee Crane had a sense of humour and could forget he was a Captain in Morton’s
presence because the pillow Chip threw at him hit him square in the face. Taking a deep breath, Lee picked the pillow
up and stalked towards him.
“Now, Lee,” Chip
protested.
“Hold still, Mr
Morton, and that’s an order.”
***
“Did you hear
something, Admiral?” Sharkey asked as he said goodnight to Nelson before
heading for his own cabin.
Nelson tilted his head
towards officers’ country, hearing the sounds of a strangled squawk, a muffled
thump and a splutter of laughter. “Er, no, Chief, did you?”
“Uh,” Sharkey
hesitated and then shook his head. “No, I guess not. Good night, Admiral.”
“Good night, Chief,”
Nelson watched him go and then headed for his own cabin, grinning broadly as he
passed Morton’s cabin and heard Lee’s muffled yelp of “No fair!” from inside. Everyone needed a little fun and he had had
his for the day. There was no point in ruining theirs by interrupting. Besides, he wasn’t sure it was a good idea to
tell Sharkey that two of the senior officers on the Seaview had the occasional
tendency to work off their frustrations with a pillow fight that usually ended
up with both of them in a fit of hysterical giggles...
End